Rite. Write. Right.

Date: 23rd December 2006
Time: Around 7.45 pm
Venue: This surau near Dewan Merak Kayangan, Jalan Semarak, KL

My family and I were on our way to my brother’s wedding reception. We filled up 3 cars and as I was with my dad, we were the first to arrive in the surau near Dewan Merak Kayangan. After Maghrib, Kak Long, Kak Yah and I went out to the parking lot just in time to run into those who were with my sister and my brother-in-law. Since my mother (who is on a wheelchair because she can’t walk properly after the accident 4 years ago) was with Kak Lin, she had to park her car facing the qiblah so that Mak would be able to pray in the car. It was impossible for her to pray in the surau and we were in a hurry as we were the family of the groom, anyway. The way the car was parked was obstructing cars leaving the surau but it was in no way totally blocking it. Plus, Kak Lin didn’t even switch off the engine and my brother Afif was right outside, guarding both the car and helping those who wanted to get out.

And then, there was this MPV.

The driver was having trouble going out of the parking lot and Afif graciously helped him. Suddenly I noticed Afif was raising his voice and so I asked him what happened. "Dia marah kita park kat sini tapi bile nak explain tak nak dengar plak! Tingkap pun tak nak turunkan!" Good deeds don’t always come around, yeah?

There was this lady standing next to me and she was the mistress of the car, it seemed. She was angry so I told her about Mak. What did she say next? "Cakap la awal-awal." And I was like "Hello! Adik saya dah nak explain tapi suami makcik (she was NOT YOUNG) yang tak nak dengar!" She ignored me. Things were getting pretty heated up by then as Kak Lin and Abang Azmi noticed that Afif was annoyed and they too were starting to get angry as Afif explained to them what was going on. They told us to ignore these inconsiderate and "bloody rude people" and voila! The mistress of the car blew up.

MPV Lady: "Pandai-pandai cakap orang kurang ajar ye?"

Kak Lin and Abang Azmi: "Excuse me! My mother is on a wheel chair and she has to pray in the car! Sebab tu la kereta tu letak menghadap qiblah!"

And she started shoving her little finger at Kak Lin’s face, only making Abang Azmi angrier.

And then, in comes the husband. I thought he would be trying to calm his wife but he added fuel to the fire. Well, siap ajak Abang Azmi bertumbuk lagi. Haha. S.T.U.P.I.D.

What happened next?

The lady called us BASTARD.

We gasped and said "Astaghfirullah" and the lady said "Pandai pun mengucap." What an ironic thing to say! And then the husband echoed her. Called us ‘the name’ and left. What an intellectual way to argue, huh?

Well, I can understand why they were upset. Fine, the car was making it hard for them to leave but Afif offered his help and explanation. Did the driver listen? Nope. He just ignored him and continued being angry. (By the way, there was also another car and they asked us why we parked that way and when Afif explained, they understood and left peacefully and quietly). My mother even intervened by apologizing to them yet they ignored her and continued screaming at Kak Lin and Abang Azmi.

And the wife. Kenapa dia pulak nak melebih-lebih? You were supposed to calm your husband yet you were the fire. And what a lady-like thing to say! In front of Allah’s house, right after Maghrib prayer, in front of many people and last but not least, IN FRONT OF YOUR CHILDREN! Shame on you! Cili mulut tu baru tau!

These are ignorant, inconsiderate, selfish people. They don’t even know how to argue intellectually. Budi bahasa pun tak pandai nak jaga. Suami isteri sama saja. (Like my mom and Asni said: "Patutla bersuami isteri. They are a reflection of one another.")

And all the man had to do was listen.

No wonder Reader’s Digest named KL as one of the rudest cities in the world!

I wish I jotted down their car plate number!

Last weekend was totally hectic at home.

My brother got married on the 17th of December and his reception was yesterday, 25th December.

And no matter how busy things were at home, I have to say I had fun. Seeing family members who I hadn’t seen in months and even years! Even though I had to become a nomad because my own room was over-populated with little kids, I didn’t mind one bit. Even though I had to wait at least 20 minutes every morning before I could brush my teeth, it wasn’t a bother to me. Even though I had to miss my good friend’s wedding, the loss was made up with the great time I had at home.

I was able to catch up with Asni and Kak Long, bullied Pipah, argued with Alif, met Kak Nor and Abang Win, put inai on Anis and Aina’s hands, had Kak Yah spoil me a bit (just like the old days), listened to Mimi and Syazana squabbling and hung out under the tent while watching Asna and Shahirah gave away bahulus and sweets to the well-wishers.

It’s true what they say, no matter how many friends that you’ve got, your family will always be the first for you. Always.

And not to mention the many uncles and aunts (friends of my parents) that I haven’t met since I was just a little kid.

Oh yeah, my friends came over too. I’m glad you guys did and I hope you enjoyed the food. (I bet the boys did!). When I get married, I expect more than 6 cars yeah? Huhu…

And now, thanks to Anas, I have an eye infection - conjunctivitis! The good side of it is that I am able to cut classes legally! Haha.

We are so much more alike than we care to notice. That day, when you told me that you are the black sheep of your family, I am reminded of myself. I will never and have never gone through as much as you had, but that feeling of ‘worthlessness’ inside of you that I know you still think off and you still ponder upon, I think I understand. And the fact that you had gone through ‘the road not taken’, I have become you.

Then why is it that we struggle to understand each other? Why is it that we argue all the time?

Love grows and sometimes it dies. It comes and it goes. But I know one thing for sure, despite me loving and hating people, despite my dying affection for people, despite my longing for people, I can never love anyone else the way I love you. And I will never ever stop loving you.

Because you are my life. Because you are the reason I live. Because you’ve given me much more than anyone else have ever given me. Because I owe you my life. Because you are my everything.

Everytime we argue, I always feel guilty. Always. I never show it to you perhaps of the weakness of my heart and the ego of my soul. ‘Sorry’ is the hardest word.

You’re always the one I think of in every decision I make in my life. You’re the one I do not ever wish to disappoint again. You are a huge part of my life. And not a day that goes by that I don’t think of you.

Now, I’ve done it again. I’ve made you angry. I’ve made you sad. But I need you to understand why I am the way I am. Sometimes I think you think that I’m a rotten person. And if I were you, I think I would think so too…

And perhaps, what’s more important, I need to understand you. I need to understand your rationality and irrationality. I need to understand you fears and tears. I need to understand why you did what you did.

I’M SORRY. I LOVE YOU.

I think we are all aware of the new dressing rule imposed by the Kelantan government and the Kota Bharu Municipal Council. For one, I applaud and welcome the rule! But read this article:

Shahrizat: Dress code is disrespectful and undermines women’s capabilities

I don’t understand the logic here. How is it that donning more respectable clothes can undermine a woman’s capability? In a way, she is implying that a woman is judged by the way she dresses and looks. Isn’t that a little chauvinistic? And why is it that being asked to cover our aurah is a form of discrimination when Allah Himself orders women (and men too) to cover our aurah? Why are we questioning God’s order?

"O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that
they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad):
that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not
molested. And Allah is Oft- Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Surah Al-Ahzab, ayah 33)

"And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and
guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and
ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they
should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty
except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband’s fathers, their
sons, their husbands’ sons, their brothers or their brothers’ sons, or
their sisters’ sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right
hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small
children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should
not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden
ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that
ye may attain Bliss." (Surah An-Nur, ayah 31)

Ignorance in religion is dangerous. If we do not know enough about Islam to talk about Islam, it is best to not question things that are mentioned in the Quran and Hadith. If we do so, we will be questioning God and the person nearest to Him. You may use the excuse of human or women rights or whatever, but Allah has not given us RIGHTS. Instead, He has given us DUTIES. Because we are here on Earth as a Khalifah and a servant with one reason: to uphold Islam.

I found this from the website "Islam Message":

Quote (Unknown Author): “A Muslim woman who covers her head is making a
statement about her identity. Anyone who sees her will know that she is
a Muslim and has a good moral character. Many Muslim women who cover
are filled with dignity and self esteem; they are pleased to be
identified as a Muslim woman. As a chaste, modest, pure woman, she does
not want her sexuality to enter into interactions with men in the
smallest degree. A woman who covers herself is concealing her sexuality
but allowing her femininity to be brought out.”

I was browsing through the website of the local bookstore and publisher ‘Silverfish Books’ and I came across this very disturbing article.

Malaysian Reading Stats

That’s why new graduates are still struggling in English despite having studied the language for at least 15 years. That’s why teachers who are teaching Science and Maths in English make silly (but shocking!) mistakes while teaching in class. That’s why students especially those from rural areas hate English.

THEY DON’T READ ENOUGH.

Well, some don’t read at all.

My beloved lecturer who taught me last semester mentioned that he believes that the best way to learn English is not by drilling on the aspects of the language’s grammatical rules like what our education system is doing now. For students of linguistics as myself, I’m sure that you are well aware that these rules are traditional method of grammar, prescriptive grammar where the grammarians tell us what is right and wrong without us questioning the rules. But further studies have shown that not all rules lined out by grammarians are applicable in all situations as I, myself had discover last semester when I took ‘Semantics’. So the best way of knowing what is right and wrong in a language is to get involved or experience the language’s actual data. That means, you can either hang out with native speakers or READ!

Literature is a depiction of life, a depiction of current events and history. Literature is viewing the world through a different point of view. Literature is understanding.

When we read, we learn, we discover and we understand. As a result, those who read a lot (like my lecturer who teaches me ‘Research Methodology’ this semester) know a lot. It’s amazing what we can find out by reading.

Don’t believe me? Start reading to find out!